February

February 2: Everyone knows that chemotherapy causes hair loss, just sometimes it comes out faster than expected. On the morning of February 2 I had hair, by 5 o’clock with the help of a roll of tape and a caring mother, I didn't.  Bonus, the tape made awesome fake mustaches. 

February 6:  I was back in the hospital receiving chemo. We were able to finish part of the treatment at home to get out of the hospital ASAP.

 February 7: Hospital work is thousands times worse than home work.

February 9: Mafia party rocked, even if some people got a little too carried away. It’s only a game, your not really getting killed.

          February 17: I felt much better; my counts did not drop with this round of Ara-C chemo treatment like last time because They say I was not sick unlike last time had the flu. Doctors will not let us go anywhere, we wanted to drive to the ocean this weekend, but they worry about my platelets that are on the border line of transfusion. Right now if all I am worrying about is going somewhere, life is good! It almost feels normal again. Almost.

February 26: I’m still having back pain and a little knee pain but with morphine it's controllable. In the hospital again. Talkative nurse equals zero sleep time. Mom helped trim the 6 hairs I have growing back.

Its Back!

It has been over 5 months since I have updated my blog. The reason I started this blog was to inform, entertain, be able to reflect on my accomplishments, and to give hope where need; because without hope, we’d just be an empty shell of skin and bones.  So, in order to summarize 5 long months of chemotherapy I will write 5 post, one for each month. Starting with February and ending in June.

Crazy Week

This week has been crazy and horrible and ends bitterly happy. Monday the 14^th of Jan my homebound teacher came and I started school again, she is cool and I am really excited to work with her and best of all I get to stay on schedule with my peers and can rejoin them my senior year and graduate on time.

On Tuesday, the 15 of January I had my initial appointment with the Radiation Doctor and his team, he is a nice person who answered all my concerns. I must admit that Radiation scares me but I will have to deal with that when the time comes (about 11 months from now) unless my cancer doesn’t respond well to the chemo then it may be sooner. I also had to have a Brain and Spine MRI with contrast to measure the progress of the two cancer spots in my brain and the large area on my spine. They did this to see if the tumors are growing or responding to the chemo.

Wednesday the 16^th was when I had to have a bone marrow biopsy to check if the cancer had entered bone marrow, if that happens then I need a bone marrow transplant (you can Google it) also, it would decrease the chance that I would survive by 15%. The doctors told us that MRI results look great; the spots in my head and on my spine seem to be responding well to the chemo, great news! Although these areas are still there, they are not growing. Then on Wednesday (16^th of Jan) after I woke up from the bone marrow sedation, I was admitted to San Antonio Military Medical Center (AKA - prison where torture is legal) - when I say torture I mean chemotherapy and its side effects. The first torture was my knees; sever pain, the worst in my life, it felt like someone was taking a blender to the inside of my knees. It was to the point where I couldn’t walk without help, even with morphine. Then they started the 48 hour chemotherapy treatment consisting of Ara-C which was given over 3 hours and then 6 hours off and then chemo for 3 hours and 6 hours off…this cycle continued until Friday the 18^th of Jan. Of course it couldn’t be that simple, I ran a temperature ranging from 99.7 to 100.7 which caused alarm and the doctors decided to give me a round of IV antibiotics. I was very sick at my stomach and ache everywhere. My heart rate would jump from 98 beats to 214 which scared my dad and the doctors, it got better by itself so we think it was a result of the chemo or an equipment failure. My ache in my knees was still really bad so the doctor ordered X-Rays, he was looking for something called A-Vascular Necrosis (AVN) which is what they think I might be developing. It is something that happens from years of chemo and massive amounts of steroids. This is not a good thing, it is also called dead bone disease. There is no cure, they treat it with hyperbaric chamber and try to make you as comfortable as possible through pain control. I hope this isn’t what I get, for now I am just in a lot of pain.

Saturday the 19^th of Jan, it’s finally time to be paroled until Tuesday the 22^nd when I go back for blood counts. They expect my immune system to bottom out soon due to this intense chemo I just received. They say I will probably need blood transfusion and platelets to protect me from bleeding out. They are going to allow my parents to give me a shot at home, can you believe that? At the end of this round of chemo they give me a shot to help boost my immune system, the shot cannot be given for 12 hours after the last chemo. So if we choose we can be paroled (discharged) and give the shot at home. I choose parole!! So they teach my mom and dad how to do the shot and ask “okay, who want to do it”? I thought my mom was going to but my dad jump up and said he would do it. He cleaned my arm and pinched the area just like they showed but then he stabbed me the shot like it was a dart or something. I must admit knowing I can go home a day early is worth it, I am going to buy him a dart board for the practice. Finally we get home Saturday the 19^th and have to take my sister Sarah to the Airport, I will miss her and she really helped us when she was here, thank you Sarah!

Daily life of a cancer teen

Most teens worry about if their girlfriend is cheating on them or if Jamie is talking about you. Normal teen drama. I would like to take your time just to vent on my daily worries. Starting with the top worry. Is today my last day? I think about the possibility of cancer killing me almost everyday for about 5 minutes. Then I get out of bed and take my morning medicine. Which includes steroids and Zantac. The steroids have a crap ton on side effects from hunger to changes in emotions. The best thing about the steroids they are the best treatment for the cancer other than chemotherapy treatment. Then I get a shower. It's hard to stand in the shower because of  the pain in my joints caused by the chemotherapy and steroids. After the shower I get dressed and lay down on the couch. A normal teen would be off to school. I can not go to school because I'm immune compromised. Like a newborn, anything that is contagious I could get. From the flu to whopping cough. So school is out of the option. I'm home bound school starting Monday. A teacher will come to my house and teach me everything I need to get my high-school diploma. So after that I'm hungry for everything. So I eat a lot and the chemotherapy slows down your digestion which means I'm full of  food but I'm still eating. Then it's about 12 and I'm thinking how I wish I could have a job for money, but can't cause once again immune compromised. People will kill me with their germs. So now I take my noon medicine. More steroids, after that I try to talk my sister or dad to take me to hobby lobby. I have to wear a mask. So I get tons of looks. But I don't care. I'm starting my own money making business; stained glass.  Which once up and running, that will be my "job". Then I get home about 2 and I'm exhausted physically and emotionally. And I still haven't pooped. So I take a nap until my sister comes home from school and my mom comes home from work. Then I cook dinner with the help of my family. I eat fast cause I'm hungry about this time my mind is going crazy fast like I'm on speed because of the steroids. And I take some meds that calms me down watch some tv in pain and then around 8 I take more steroids. And go to bed about 10. But it's hard to fall asleep.  That is my normal day. You can make up your own thoughts is it a great life or the worse ever. You can decide that yourself. It's just my normal day.

port

under the knife

Chemotherapy is so strong that if it is put in veins it would eat it, like putting battery acid in your veins you just don’t do it. So in order to receive treatment they need to be able to put the chemotherapy where it won’t melt your arm off. And what is the strongest muscle in your body? Your heart. So how do you get chemotherapy from an intravenous bag (IV bag) to my heart? The answer is a portacath (A portacath consists of a reservoir (the portal) and a tube (the catheter). The portal is implanted under the skin in the upper chest. It may appear as a bump under the skin in thin patients, less visible in patients with thicker subcutaneous fat. The catheter runs in a tunnel under the skin, going over the collar bone and then enters the large vein in the lower neck (the internal jugular vein). Since it is completely internal swimming and bathing is not a problem. The septum of the portal is made of a special self-sealing silicone rubber. It can be punctured up to one thousand times and therefore can be used for many years.) (http://www.sir.net.au/portacath_pi.html) In order to get this item I had to go under the knife. On Monday the 17^th of December I went down to Pediatric Anesthesia Clinic the trick is they’re not going to put me asleep, just make me forget all about it. So around three o’clock I meet the surgeon and all the people that are going to be in the operating room with me. About Four o’clock they put the feel good medicine in me and took me to the OR. When I went down the room had a table and a huge TV for the x-rays that they were going to take to make sure that they cut in the right place. So I’m lying on the table when they say that they’re going to start covering me in iodine. But then they do something that I really didn’t love, they covered my face with the paper for surgery and that is the last thing I remember. The next thing I remember is waking up and seeing my dad and moms smiling face. And then I look at the area where the port is now under my skin, its covered in iodine and there is an IV needle accessing the port, providing me with much needed pain medication (see picture).

Then about an hour later I’m back to the room I call prison. On pain meds cause how sore the surgery place is and I just fall asleep and they start my first treatment of chemotherapy. They cheek my stats about every four hours. And check the surgery site. That was the basic thing they did for the next 6 days. Which were also the most boring in my life. I had my dad stay the first night. Then mom and dad alternated for the next 6 days, receiving chemotherapy off and on. And another thing the doctors started me on is Dexamethasone (steroid drug). This drug is for fighting the cancer. But the side effects, may include: Psychiatric disturbances, including personality changes, irritability, euphoria, mood swings, Osteoporosis, Muscle atrophy, negative protein balance, Elevated liver enzymes, Cushingoid, Depression of the adrenal gland, Hypertension, fluid and sodium retention, edema, worsening of heart insufficiency, Dependence with withdrawal syndrome, Increased intraocular pressure, Dermatologic: Acne, allergic dermatitis, dry scaly skin, ecchymoses and petechiae, erythema, impaired wound-healing, increased sweating, rash, striae, suppression of reactions to skin tests, thin fragile skin, thinning scalp hair, urticaria, and Pronounced night sweats. Needless to say, it’s wrecking havoc on more than just the cancer.

Prison

                The hospital room is like a prison cell, it has four wall. Entering the room you see two hospital beds same size same blanket same everything. The walls are white. And the floor is a dirty cream color. There are two Flat screen TVs on the wall counter of the beds. Moving towards the back of the hospital room on the lot is another sink. Facing forward is a window facing train track. Turning left you enter the bath room just a toilet and a shower.                                                                                      
                For the stay we mostly tried to keep our sprits high, and fighting boredom with everything I knew how. My father and I connected the PS3 with a lot of luck and bubble gum. So, I played a few games. Without any Internet connection first person shooters are the best way to become even more bored. Then the visitors, not the type that you like, the ones that you don't know who they are because they're your parents colleagues. And nobody knows what to say. One big awkward moment. For the next few days I had to find many different ways to stay entertained. Most of them lasted for an hour or so. Then my tailbone pain would become too much and I would fall asleep on the Morphine.